Breakdowns in Lockdown?
As the media buzzes with news of the latest high profile figure to be caught breaking the lockdown rules, I sense around me growing disengagement and disenchantment. I see and hear disquieting evidence that lockdown is privately as well as publicly breaking down.
Professor Neil Ferguson , senior Government adviser those advice directly led to the UK lockdown, resigned on Wed May 6th after allowing his married lover to repeatedly visit his home in direct contravention of his own rules. This followed in the footsteps of Scotland's Chief Medical Adviser, forced to step down recently for flaunting her own advise to 'stay at home' by merrily heading herself to her second one for weekends away.
No surprise then that the current catchphrase is 'breakdown in lockdown?' News emerges of underground hairdressers, undercover gyms, secret sports matches, secret garden parties, you name it, people are finding ingenious ways to justify doing it. A complex web of "flexible interpretations" is emerging as people seek to make sense of the continually changing, conflicting and mixed messages from our Government.
I am not surprised. I do get it. I try to understand. As someone wiser than me wrote:
'I do not walk in their shoes.
I do not know their stories.
It is not my place to judge.'
But it is hard not to despair when I see not one but nine, yes 9, active building sites in our village, with non social distancing builders whose vans block the pavements forcing pedestrians into the oncoming ( and now as busy as ever) traffic.
Hard not to despair at the sight of a football match on the village green, in flagrant breach of the rules, being condoned, even applauded, by locals. Hard not to despair at a large group of cyclists blatantly riding through the village proudly displaying their club logos on their vivid green vests.
Hard not to despair when I hear comments I can never un-hear, especially when dropped with confidence within communal virtual coffee meetings. I empathise with a friend who sadly predicated her social circles may be much reduced post lockdown. Strong friendships will endure, these bonds have held through worse than this, but circumstantial ones , minus the ties of circumstance, have exposed underlying differences which may be hard to forget, let alone forgive.
I do understand. How can I not? It is clearly illogical to queue to enter a supermarket at the mercy of an indistinct chalk 2 metre marker , then to shop inside a confined space with little social distancing enforcement and then be banned from a social distanced coffee/walk. The sense that 'we' have been treated like children resonantly daily and clearly impacts on rebellious attitudes across society, top to bottom.
Yet against despair there is much that unites us. My daily walk brings delight and hope to balance depressing sights of breakdowns in lockdown. People are finding unique, wonderful ways to stay safe and still bring us together. Every day a family in the village pose stuffed animals on the communal verge to delight and absorb passing locals. This inspirational 'shared' pastime fills me with joy.
Villages find painted shells on garden walls, lining the kerbs, as if by magic, a visible symbol of why we are where we are, a physical reminder of the nations shared resolve to survive this storm and emerge into the sunlight,
This post contains tales from near and far and this from New Zealand which brought home to me how messy and bleak it can feel here. Every day brings more broken promises, more bleak news of grim death tolls, more confusing rhetoric and contradictory advice. I look at my rainbow shell in hope that despite breakdowns we are holding strong, as they did over there.
Claire from Wellington, New Zealand.
New Zealand went officially into lock down on Wednesday 25th March at 1159pm . We had just over 48 hours notice to get ready for this . I remember feeling very on edge the week before sensing that something was about to happen and I remember a sense of urgency over the weekend arranging to see our son on the Monday saying he must come now or it will be too late to see him. My prediction was confirmed with the 1pm news on the Monday. We all sat listening to Jacinda Arderne our Prime minister as she declared the state of emergency for the nation.I am so pleased we were together as a family at that defining moment. . It was one of those moments which will always be etched on my memory as we sat listening to the news over lunch together.
Since then there has been many broadcasts at 1pm with the nation watching their TV sets and hanging on every word from Ashley Bloomfield our Director of Health usually with our Prime Minister about the latest Covid-19 news. I was working though the period as a nurse considered an essential worker. I could not stay home, we were all in this together. No matter whether I was at work or home I listened, we all listened to that bulletin.
Since then events have moved on in New Zealand we have gone to level 3 as the virus has hopefully been contained over here. Its become less of a threat but still there, an unseen enemy. Tragically in the UK not gone away yet. It will one day .
Meanwhile this week I am made aware again of the threat as my mum in a rest home in the UK is unwell with a slightly raised temperature. My brother phoned on his birthday to say Mum was in isolation and needed to be tested for Covid-19 . Thankfully she seems okay , very puzzled to be treated by nurses in full protective gear and left to cope on her own for many hours of the day. The staff say she is coping well with the isolation despite the dementia. Yes amazing my Mum, she remembers the war years as a child in the UK , the long queues at the shops and hiding in a bunker in the garden when the air raid alarms sounded. The enemy then could be seen or heard only this time its different . A silent enemy, thankfully for mum and the rest of the home the swab result is negative and life in the home can go back to some sort of normality.
.........................................
If only we in the UK had the same sense of one united purpose. I know of people , folk who would 'normally' look askance at parking on a double yellow line, whose longing to see family has led them to decide on visiting other households against all the 'stay at home' primary advice.
For others loneliness has led to social distancing coffee mornings, sitting in chairs in the open air chatting 2 metres away, in gardens, on verges, in parks. We are all at the mercy of circumstance, we all make our own ways through this journey, but I cannot help worrying the consequences and significance of all these small individual decisions coming together into collective disaster.
If I am honest, I am envious of those who have found ways to see their loved ones. My heart is breaking for my family but we are too many, too distanced, too multi generational, it is impossible to even consider. I long for change but how? One possible proposal of a 'social bubble' of 10 people in future weeks fills me with dread. How can families to choose who to see and who not, to select one grandma and not another....my mind simply refuses to go there.
Instead my mind consumes itself with worry about the stresses and strains everyday living and working from home is having on everyone I love. Nor am I alone is sensing a gradual breakdown not just in lockdown but in the early positivism households embraced as the weeks take their toll, as is evident is this update from Grace.
Grace Austin
Working Lives
The experience of members of my small family demonstrates the impact of the virus on working life. I have a small pension income which I contribute to our shared income. This would normally be doubled by hosting singers from Glyndebourne during the spring and summer. Of course they will not arrive this year.
The annexe where they would have stayed now houses my daughter, her partner and their baby in exile from London. They are both self employed and their income has plummeted to zero since Lockdown. As a sound technician for bands playing large venues round the world her partner will probably be out of work for many months if not years. He is starting to consider alternative ways of earning a living – music teacher? Difficult at the moment with social distancing. He will apply for the self employed payment which launches in June. My daughter, a media professional, is already seeking work locally through friends and contacts here. She was scheduled to return to work after maternity leave in the Autumn but feels she will have to return sooner. She will not qualify for the self employed payment, having been in receipt of minimum maternity pay as a self employed person.
At the other end of the scale my other daughter is working full time as a senior manager in a performance company and caring three days a week for her 3 year old child. The stress was palpable in her voice when we spoke on the phone. The tears came as she talked of her duty towards the artists and students she works with, and the challenge of Zoom meetings with her child just out of screen shot. She said neither the work nor the childcare reach her usual standards.
Normally there would be nursery and shared childcare with friends as support, and her partner would have been available before he was asked to work longer hours as one of our key workers, on minimum wage, protected only by gloves, growing vegetables and delivering boxes across Kent. Many of her friends are in the same situation, especially key workers in transport and care, stretched to their limits. She is going to take annual leave in order to have a break from this level of stress as furloughing her position appears to be out of the question. If it continues much longer she may well seek to reduce her hours and accept the inevitable pay cut.
My husband continues to work part time from home with, perversely, his international organisation saving money by substituting Zoom meetings for face to face ones, and as a result of the cancellation of seminars and conferences. The organisation wonders how the international projects that they have awarded grants to will be implemented.
He and I run an environmental organisation and before Lockdown we were engaged in collaborations with a visual art gallery and an international performance organisation for which we have agreed to supply materials. We still have contracts with these organisations and are able to continue the management processes which will see these obligations fulfilled at a later date. But of course income will be delayed and we are hesitant about undertaking the bulk of the work in a time of uncertainty.
We are fortunate that we are able to support our family. They are established and no-one will go hungry or lose their home. These young people are skilled and resilient and will be able to adapt to whatever the next stage in the drama will be. My hope is that we will not return to the old status quo and that we can support them in visualising and forging new ways of working and living when the crisis is over.
....................
Another regular contributor, Steve Eagle, sent this update about his own changing work life balance:
For me personally, lockdown continues to be bittersweet. The sweetness is in seeing my little boy grow. Almost 9 months old now and I’ve seen so much more of him than I would have done without lockdown. I notice the subtle changes in his development. Priceless changes that I would have not noticed so much if I was not at home.
One big change though is that since 15th April I’ve been working from home rather than being on furlough. I’m the only one in my department working which puts a lot of pressure on me especially when the survival of the charity or at least some people’s jobs feel considerably in my hands.
This has been great in terms of the desire I had to do something to help in the crisis. I am providing chaplaincy/pastoral care support to the homeless and others over the phone and fundraising to help ensure that the charity survives this crisis.
I see far less of my little boy and it makes me sad when I imagine that he thinks I’ve lost interest in him and would rather be on my laptop which is of course not the case.
As the media buzzes with news of the latest high profile figure to be caught breaking the lockdown rules, I sense around me growing disengagement and disenchantment. I see and hear disquieting evidence that lockdown is privately as well as publicly breaking down.
Professor Neil Ferguson , senior Government adviser those advice directly led to the UK lockdown, resigned on Wed May 6th after allowing his married lover to repeatedly visit his home in direct contravention of his own rules. This followed in the footsteps of Scotland's Chief Medical Adviser, forced to step down recently for flaunting her own advise to 'stay at home' by merrily heading herself to her second one for weekends away.
No surprise then that the current catchphrase is 'breakdown in lockdown?' News emerges of underground hairdressers, undercover gyms, secret sports matches, secret garden parties, you name it, people are finding ingenious ways to justify doing it. A complex web of "flexible interpretations" is emerging as people seek to make sense of the continually changing, conflicting and mixed messages from our Government.
I am not surprised. I do get it. I try to understand. As someone wiser than me wrote:
'I do not walk in their shoes.
I do not know their stories.
It is not my place to judge.'
But it is hard not to despair when I see not one but nine, yes 9, active building sites in our village, with non social distancing builders whose vans block the pavements forcing pedestrians into the oncoming ( and now as busy as ever) traffic.
Hard not to despair at the sight of a football match on the village green, in flagrant breach of the rules, being condoned, even applauded, by locals. Hard not to despair at a large group of cyclists blatantly riding through the village proudly displaying their club logos on their vivid green vests.
Hard not to despair when I hear comments I can never un-hear, especially when dropped with confidence within communal virtual coffee meetings. I empathise with a friend who sadly predicated her social circles may be much reduced post lockdown. Strong friendships will endure, these bonds have held through worse than this, but circumstantial ones , minus the ties of circumstance, have exposed underlying differences which may be hard to forget, let alone forgive.
I do understand. How can I not? It is clearly illogical to queue to enter a supermarket at the mercy of an indistinct chalk 2 metre marker , then to shop inside a confined space with little social distancing enforcement and then be banned from a social distanced coffee/walk. The sense that 'we' have been treated like children resonantly daily and clearly impacts on rebellious attitudes across society, top to bottom.
Yet against despair there is much that unites us. My daily walk brings delight and hope to balance depressing sights of breakdowns in lockdown. People are finding unique, wonderful ways to stay safe and still bring us together. Every day a family in the village pose stuffed animals on the communal verge to delight and absorb passing locals. This inspirational 'shared' pastime fills me with joy.
Villages find painted shells on garden walls, lining the kerbs, as if by magic, a visible symbol of why we are where we are, a physical reminder of the nations shared resolve to survive this storm and emerge into the sunlight,
This post contains tales from near and far and this from New Zealand which brought home to me how messy and bleak it can feel here. Every day brings more broken promises, more bleak news of grim death tolls, more confusing rhetoric and contradictory advice. I look at my rainbow shell in hope that despite breakdowns we are holding strong, as they did over there.
Claire from Wellington, New Zealand.
New Zealand went officially into lock down on Wednesday 25th March at 1159pm . We had just over 48 hours notice to get ready for this . I remember feeling very on edge the week before sensing that something was about to happen and I remember a sense of urgency over the weekend arranging to see our son on the Monday saying he must come now or it will be too late to see him. My prediction was confirmed with the 1pm news on the Monday. We all sat listening to Jacinda Arderne our Prime minister as she declared the state of emergency for the nation.I am so pleased we were together as a family at that defining moment. . It was one of those moments which will always be etched on my memory as we sat listening to the news over lunch together.
Since then there has been many broadcasts at 1pm with the nation watching their TV sets and hanging on every word from Ashley Bloomfield our Director of Health usually with our Prime Minister about the latest Covid-19 news. I was working though the period as a nurse considered an essential worker. I could not stay home, we were all in this together. No matter whether I was at work or home I listened, we all listened to that bulletin.
Since then events have moved on in New Zealand we have gone to level 3 as the virus has hopefully been contained over here. Its become less of a threat but still there, an unseen enemy. Tragically in the UK not gone away yet. It will one day .
Meanwhile this week I am made aware again of the threat as my mum in a rest home in the UK is unwell with a slightly raised temperature. My brother phoned on his birthday to say Mum was in isolation and needed to be tested for Covid-19 . Thankfully she seems okay , very puzzled to be treated by nurses in full protective gear and left to cope on her own for many hours of the day. The staff say she is coping well with the isolation despite the dementia. Yes amazing my Mum, she remembers the war years as a child in the UK , the long queues at the shops and hiding in a bunker in the garden when the air raid alarms sounded. The enemy then could be seen or heard only this time its different . A silent enemy, thankfully for mum and the rest of the home the swab result is negative and life in the home can go back to some sort of normality.
.........................................
If only we in the UK had the same sense of one united purpose. I know of people , folk who would 'normally' look askance at parking on a double yellow line, whose longing to see family has led them to decide on visiting other households against all the 'stay at home' primary advice.
For others loneliness has led to social distancing coffee mornings, sitting in chairs in the open air chatting 2 metres away, in gardens, on verges, in parks. We are all at the mercy of circumstance, we all make our own ways through this journey, but I cannot help worrying the consequences and significance of all these small individual decisions coming together into collective disaster.
If I am honest, I am envious of those who have found ways to see their loved ones. My heart is breaking for my family but we are too many, too distanced, too multi generational, it is impossible to even consider. I long for change but how? One possible proposal of a 'social bubble' of 10 people in future weeks fills me with dread. How can families to choose who to see and who not, to select one grandma and not another....my mind simply refuses to go there.
Instead my mind consumes itself with worry about the stresses and strains everyday living and working from home is having on everyone I love. Nor am I alone is sensing a gradual breakdown not just in lockdown but in the early positivism households embraced as the weeks take their toll, as is evident is this update from Grace.
Grace Austin
Working Lives
The experience of members of my small family demonstrates the impact of the virus on working life. I have a small pension income which I contribute to our shared income. This would normally be doubled by hosting singers from Glyndebourne during the spring and summer. Of course they will not arrive this year.
The annexe where they would have stayed now houses my daughter, her partner and their baby in exile from London. They are both self employed and their income has plummeted to zero since Lockdown. As a sound technician for bands playing large venues round the world her partner will probably be out of work for many months if not years. He is starting to consider alternative ways of earning a living – music teacher? Difficult at the moment with social distancing. He will apply for the self employed payment which launches in June. My daughter, a media professional, is already seeking work locally through friends and contacts here. She was scheduled to return to work after maternity leave in the Autumn but feels she will have to return sooner. She will not qualify for the self employed payment, having been in receipt of minimum maternity pay as a self employed person.
At the other end of the scale my other daughter is working full time as a senior manager in a performance company and caring three days a week for her 3 year old child. The stress was palpable in her voice when we spoke on the phone. The tears came as she talked of her duty towards the artists and students she works with, and the challenge of Zoom meetings with her child just out of screen shot. She said neither the work nor the childcare reach her usual standards.
Normally there would be nursery and shared childcare with friends as support, and her partner would have been available before he was asked to work longer hours as one of our key workers, on minimum wage, protected only by gloves, growing vegetables and delivering boxes across Kent. Many of her friends are in the same situation, especially key workers in transport and care, stretched to their limits. She is going to take annual leave in order to have a break from this level of stress as furloughing her position appears to be out of the question. If it continues much longer she may well seek to reduce her hours and accept the inevitable pay cut.
My husband continues to work part time from home with, perversely, his international organisation saving money by substituting Zoom meetings for face to face ones, and as a result of the cancellation of seminars and conferences. The organisation wonders how the international projects that they have awarded grants to will be implemented.
He and I run an environmental organisation and before Lockdown we were engaged in collaborations with a visual art gallery and an international performance organisation for which we have agreed to supply materials. We still have contracts with these organisations and are able to continue the management processes which will see these obligations fulfilled at a later date. But of course income will be delayed and we are hesitant about undertaking the bulk of the work in a time of uncertainty.
We are fortunate that we are able to support our family. They are established and no-one will go hungry or lose their home. These young people are skilled and resilient and will be able to adapt to whatever the next stage in the drama will be. My hope is that we will not return to the old status quo and that we can support them in visualising and forging new ways of working and living when the crisis is over.
....................
Another regular contributor, Steve Eagle, sent this update about his own changing work life balance:
For me personally, lockdown continues to be bittersweet. The sweetness is in seeing my little boy grow. Almost 9 months old now and I’ve seen so much more of him than I would have done without lockdown. I notice the subtle changes in his development. Priceless changes that I would have not noticed so much if I was not at home.
One big change though is that since 15th April I’ve been working from home rather than being on furlough. I’m the only one in my department working which puts a lot of pressure on me especially when the survival of the charity or at least some people’s jobs feel considerably in my hands.
This has been great in terms of the desire I had to do something to help in the crisis. I am providing chaplaincy/pastoral care support to the homeless and others over the phone and fundraising to help ensure that the charity survives this crisis.
I see far less of my little boy and it makes me sad when I imagine that he thinks I’ve lost interest in him and would rather be on my laptop which is of course not the case.
....................................
Steve is not the only one struggling with work life balance, a tricky situation at the best of times and this is certainly not one of those. His desire to contribute in a divided and unequal society is one I truly believe we all share. Time hangs heavily on those who cannot work, especially those now furloughed or out of work. The economic pressure on individuals and our society grows by the day.
The early impetus to use the time usefully for many has faded away into frustration and longing to return to normality. A 70 year old friend in Lewes has penned an ode to lockdown to end this post on a lighter note as he reflects on passing this time. His articulate , funny alphabet brings a welcome reassurance of shared purpose, neighbourliness, pulling together , sticking together, bonding together.
An A to Z of Lockdown
A Adapting
We are all adapting, using new technology, socialising differently, shopping differently. We’ve coped better than expected. That doesn’t mean we aren’t sometimes yearning for lost freedom.
B Books
Not read as many books as might have been expected. I’ve escaped from the real world reading thrillers, The Silent Patient by Alex Michaelides and John Le Carre’s Agent Running in the Field.
I remembered the good old days when we only had to worry about Brexit when reading Decline and Fail, a collection of John Crace’s parliamentary sketches written for The Guardian, signed copy no less.
C Clapping
We have been clapping for NHS staff and they sure deserve our appreciation, but C could also be for carers and I am thinking of my Mum’s care home where residents have succumbed to Covid-19. Also the NHS is not and should not be a charity.
We have been clapping for NHS staff and they sure deserve our appreciation, but C could also be for carers and I am thinking of my Mum’s care home where residents have succumbed to Covid-19. Also the NHS is not and should not be a charity.
D Decluttering
Decluttering hasn’t really happened, but a few days ago I did decide that I no longer needed receipts for curtains a a former house.
E Essential
We are allowed out for essential shopping. I used to quite often buy Tesco’s Finest products. Now it has to be Waitrose Essentials.
F Fear
Covid-19 is scary and there is much to fear, but F could also stand for friendliness – a ‘we are all in this together’ Lewes love-in. More fear, I fear, in urban areas.
G Garden
Sunshine and rain means the garden grows and we have been planting. The garden centre made a joint delivery to houses on our road. My wife ordered Miracle Gro; she is still the same height.
H Hair
Hair today, not gone tomorrow or the day after. When can I get my hair cut?
I Inequality
Covid-19 has highlighted inequality. Enough said.
J Jokes
There is not much to laugh about but jokes in some Radio Four comedies, Have I Got News for You,
The Mash Report, Private Eye and some social media content can still make me smile.
K Kia
Our ‘new’ car is a Kia. Six weeks on from when we bought it, it has done all of 47 miles. At this rate
our annual mileage will be 407.
L Landport Bottom
I don’t know why the downs at the top of the Nevill Estate are called Landport Bottom but almost
every day we are hugely grateful for having this space on our doorstep, where lambs gambol,
skylarks sing and you can see for miles. We’ve also explored nearby woodland and found bluebells.
M Money
We are saving money. A week ago I bought a paper in the local shop. It was the first time I had used
cash in over a month.
N. Neighbours
We are lucky to have neighbourly neighbours. We have a WhatsApp group. We help each other with
shopping. Every morning at 11 am we gather in the street for a socially distant but still social chat. My wife volunteered with Nevill Good Neighbours, for example shopping for housebound Nevill
Residents or collecting prescriptions.
O Obituaries
I confess that I began looking at obituaries on the Guardian website some time ago. Now there are
lots of them.
P Plants
With time on their hands and shopping more difficult it seems lots of people are trying to grow their
own vegetables and we are no exception. We don’t have a greenhouse and while still delicate there
are tomatoes, cucumbers, courgettes etc. in pots on our kitchen floor. Often these are gifts. Never
look a gift horse in the mouth means always put a gift plant in the house.
Q Quizzes
We’ve taken part in a couple of Zoom quizzes hOur score? You could say we zoom-bombed.
R Richards
Richards are our local butchers and they also sell fruit and veg, bread and milk a few other groceries. They have made their shop safe – two customers at a time, they have started deliveries. They deserve our support.
S Sky
These days the sky seems clearer. A Gatwick plane is a rare sighting. There are far fewer cars on the
road. Seems like an upside to lockdown, but I think I’ll still want to fly occasionally and visit places by
car.
T Television
At the end of the day we generally want to sit down and watch something on the television. There are programmes we recorded long ago: we’ve now seen the first series of Killing Eve. We have been able to piggy back on Netflix subscription and have enjoyed The Crown a lot more than we thought we would. Our TV is smart and we are smart enough to access YouTube on the TV, in particular the National Theatre screenings
U Untruths
We really need political leaders with integrity who will speak honestly rather than hide facts and utter untruths. The plucky British people are not going to ‘defeat coronavirus’; they are going to have to learn to live with it for a while and it is only a co-ordinated international effort that might
eventually defeat it.
V Vinyl
We bought a turntable at the start of lockdown. It connects to the music system in our living room to provide listening for lockdown. We have listened to some of our old vinyl LPs, some of them never
played for over 50 years. Hearing an early Al Stewart LP was a delight and amazingly we could still remember the lyrics. Somehow we seem to have four Cliff Richard LPs.
W WhatsApp
I wonder how many WhatsApp groups have been created in the UK since lockdown. Communication is important but you can have too much a good thing. My phone has limited storage capacity. Question: How did you spend your time during lockdown? Answer: Much of it was spent deleting videos, memes and emoji. The constant beeping from phones is possibly a warm up to being in intensive care surrounded by electronic equipment.
X Xiaomi
Help. There aren’t many words beginning with X. Fortunately Citizens Advice have just bought a Xiaomi phone for me. Unfortunately it uses the O2 network and there is no O2 signal in my study. It will work OK in the back bedroom upstairs so now on Citizens Advice days I’m talking to clients upstairs and writing up at my desk downstairs; the challenges of WFH.
Y Yearning
Wouldn’t it be great to have a meal out, see a film at The Depot, be by the sea, go up to London for an exhibition and a play, visit our daughter in Bristol or have a holiday with our son and his wife. I’d also like to be able to visit my Mum. I think I’ll be yearning for some time yet.
Z Zoom
Zoom is the obvious choice for Z. I hadn’t heard of it before lockdown. There has been a Zoom boom during lockdown, but most other companies are not booming and many will go bust. Recession and depression. What to do? Perhaps put an old Cliff Richard LP on the new turntable.
...............
Thursday is 'clap for carers' night. The nation unites, in hope, in praise, in optimism. Our Government has promised strategies to release the stringent lockdown restrictions at the weekend. The sun is shining. I will stay positive. Here's hoping the road ahead opens up for everyone soon.
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